5 Simple Ways to Create Peace & Harmony in Your Relationships
Relationships are difficult, so if you are looking for an easy way to manage them or just be happier in them, look no further. With the Sun in Leo, we are entering a period of self-confidence and passion; you can use this energy to maximize all of your existing relationships – friendships, lovers, roommates and mothers and everyone in between!
Do you feel like you keep butting heads with someone, or do you have a “mostly” great relationship, but some communication problems can turn a good day bad in a millisecond?
It happens to all of us.
This is true whether you are single or attached, or not even thinking about a romantic relationship right now. Maybe you and your roommate really are kindred spirits, but as soon as it comes to choosing a movie to watch, it’s World War III at home.
Maybe you and a pal are completely sympatico until that awkward moment she tries to tell you what to do with your life. Maybe you are crazy about your current romantic partner, but afraid to tackle some serious topics with them. We could list examples for hours.
There’s no better time to engage and activate more peace and harmony in relationships. Start today with these 5 easy ways to create more peace and harmony in all of your relationships.
1. “Relate” is the Root Word of “Relationships”
A successful relationship is defined by 2 people who have managed to conquer communication odds and find a way to relate to each other. Having things in common with someone is one way of doing that. This common bond could be blood if you are thinking of a relative you want a more peaceful relationship with.
You could have “avoiding conflict” as a trait in common with someone you need more harmony with, so the most important thing to remember when dealing with relationships is that “relate” is the root word. When you realize and live with that knowledge at the forefront of your mind, then you will always find ways to relate to your partners, friends, and relatives. But it takes work.
Relationships need constant work. If you want a good relationship, you have to do your share, so continue looking for ways to relate to your partner. The Mutable signs, Virgo, Pisces, Sagittarius, and Gemini have the easiest time with this. They’re flexible, easy to please and to be pleased, so they’re always looking for common ground. Take some pointers from your Mutable sign friends.
Keep meeting your partner halfway and you are halfway there!
2. Don’t Hold It In!
Laughter at a funeral, noxious emissions in church, your breath before making a wish… these are all examples of things you should “hold in” and keep to yourself. Problems in a relationship, however, should not be held in. The Fixed signs Scorpio, Aquarius, Leo, and Taurus are terrible for this.
They grab a grudge and let it simmer inside until one day… well, you know what happens. No one forgets an angry Leo. Bottling up your feelings is dangerous to your relationship, and counterproductive to your quest for peace-keeping. No human is perfect, nor is any relationship.
You’re going to have a squabble now and again, and while you may accept a partner’s quirks and crannies, once in a while you are going to have to address them.
“Why do you always have to steal the remote from me when I’m just trying to relax?” is an example of someone who has held something in for too long. If you find yourself using the words “always” or “never” in love or partnership, it’s because you’ve been holding something in.
Some signs (yes we’re talking to you, Scorpio) will even keep count of the times a specific sin was committed and then bring it up in conversation. This is not healthy communicating. This is what we mean when we say “lead with love” in your horoscopes.
Try this: “Honey, you know I love Wednesday night TV, can you please record your shows Wednesday night so that I can enjoy what I have looked forward to, or perhaps you have a better solution we can work with?” There, peace in the valley, and a solution to something that has obviously been bugging you for the entire season of NCIS. Let it go, for both of your sakes!
3. Pick Your Battles
There’s an old adage, “will it matter in 10 minutes, 10 months, or 10 years?” What that means is learn to pick your battles in relationships. The fewer battles you are fighting, the more peace and harmony you will experience in your relationships.
If you’ve been with someone for years, is it really necessary to launch a war over the TV remote? No. That’s the kind of stuff you do want to hold in. Sometimes exercising flexibility, a skill the Mutable signs Gemini, Virgo, Pisces, and Sagittarius have nailed down, goes a long way.
When something bugs you, before you say a word, ask yourself, “will this matter in 10 minutes, 10 months, or 10 years?” If the resolution to the thing you are upset about is going to impact your life negatively for 10 years, then have a conversation, and don’t forget to lead with love.
If it’s not… let it go, child. Channel your inner Elsa, and let it go.
4. Choose Your Words (Mindfully)
When striving for peace and harmony in relationships, it’s important to communicate effectively. Just telling someone to communicate better is not effective, you have to actually use your words and make an effort to communicate better on your end.
If you struggle with peace and harmony in one of your primary, long-term relationships that is, it’s possible you’ve already established a negative pattern response.
Not effective: “You always steal the remote!”
“No, I don’t! Why do you always have to be such a [bleep] about everything?”
Very effective: “Honey, have you seen the remote? I’m going to watch Bachelorette now.”
“Sure, it’s right here, hang on and let me make sure my game is recorded first, okay?”
The difference here is that you changed your pattern, and this changed the response. This is a powerful tool for you to use in engaging more peace and harmony in relationships.
You can literally feel yourself in charge here, which is very empowering for you to continue taking control of your relationship with healthy communication. The reason it works is because your partner is used to you adopting one style when communicating, but you mix it up by taking a softer tone.
This catches them off guard, and even if they don’t say so, they intuitively change their tone to match yours. You’ve just related to each other and you didn’t even know! Air signs Libra, Gemini, and Aquarius are very good at this.
That’s because this requires a logical approach to communicating when we are inclined to use an emotional one. It’s just a remote. Ask nicely, and you break the pattern. It’s only logical.
5. Open That Heart
In relationships, you need to have feelings too once in a while. That’s how relationships develop over time. Air signs and Earth signs struggle with this, as they are always looking for the practical component. Water signs Cancer, Pisces, and Scorpio win the feelings component in love hands-down.
No matter what you are talking about with your love, be open. Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable. When you overcome hurt with a lover or friend, you instantly deepen your bond, so using your feelings comes in very handy when it comes to making sure your relationships go the long haul.
That’s the beautiful thing about this tip. Not only will you engage more peace and harmony in your relationship, but you are building it on love.
Acknowledging your partner’s pain and allowing them into yours is the most amazing thing to conquer in relationships. When you have accomplished that, then you have accomplished true peace and harmony in your relationships.
Lead with love, don’t keep it bottled up, let it go if it’s no biggie, be open, and just be love. How do you work to maintain peace and harmony in your relationships?
Related Article: September Soul Note - The Balance of Relationships and Self Love